Thank You Followers/My Reasons Why Award

There were plans for a special post when I reached 200 followers. This post is not only to thank you all so much for following me but the post concept changed from what I originally planned it to be. So please hang with me for a moment and I hope you understand my words and my heart behind this post. This will be a post of just words and I hope they reach you.

I am so thankful to each and every follower. In my dreams I never imagined to have even a single person read my ramblings and somewhat messy words. I’m still trying to improve at my self editing… It is a learning process. I would like have a few special thank yous that helped me continue with this blog when it was just supposed to be a nine week project.

First thanks to tetrax4berium for being my very first follower! I hope you return soon and wish you luck with all that is going on with your life.

Second thanks to Karandi for being my very first like! I was surprised that anyone found my blog. What a huge part of the aniblogging world you are and thank you for always encouraging those who just are starting.

Third thanks to Ospreyshire who really started on my commenting and I had many interesting conversations with at the start of my blog. He helped me think about being a member who does more than just like posts but to engage in the community of bloggers.

Fourth thanks to Arthifis for nominating me for my first every award on wordpress. I was so shocked and honored.

Thank you all so much for your comments, for your nominations, and for just being you. I’ve read and enjoyed your words so much I don’t think I can even put it into words. You all have been vulnerable, open, and honest. There is a theme of books, anime, comics, passion, and uniqueness that can be so overwhelming. This is truly a wonderful positive place on the internet and everyone should be proud of the community that they have created here. Thank you. Thank you so much.

So in honor of my wonderful 200 followers I am creating an award for wordpress. I don’t even know if it is legal, but this had been on my heart and I hope you read the background and understand why.


Some may or may not remember that I am a teacher. I work in a high school and it comes with its daily troubles and joys. I will be honest with you. My heart is breaking for my students. In the last two months four students have taken their lives. A sad feeling of desperation have filled the halls of my high school. A sense of powerlessness has filled the hearts of the teachers and students. Steps are being taken and in trying to reach all those around us, we feel like failures. How can I show my students that they are loved and important on a daily bases? How badly will I fail? Will I say the wrong thing or stay silent at the wrong moment?

These and more all all thoughts that have filled my mind in these last two months. I have been open on here about my own attempt at suicide and what it took for me to crawl and claw my way up again. It is odd to think that I wouldn’t be here now if it wasn’t for one text sent at the right time when I asked my friend a question. “What is the point of all this?” He answered, not telling me to grow up or get over it or forcing me to be happy. He listened and got down on my level and related to me. Human to human. Agreeing that life can be a shitstorm, but trying to remember the good parts of people and that there is still something to live for.

There was a post by Lina that talked about making a list of reasons. This award is going to be about making your reasons. Your reasons why to keep living- to keep going. Maybe at this point you don’t have an issue with depression and that is okay. Sometimes it is still good to think of all the good things in your life. Maybe you think that you have nothing and you can’t make a list of reasons. I’m going to tell you now that THERE IS NO SMALL REASON. Dig deep. Deeper if you must. There is always a reason for you to keep going and living and breathing. Maybe one of your reasons to live is that so in the morning you can eat bacon. That you will stay alive just to eat bacon again. To me this isn’t a small or silly reason. It is true to yourself and if you are every going through a rough time maybe the smallest reason will reach your heart.

So here are the rules you copy and paste:

1. Mention the person who nominated you

2. List 13 reasons why you keep going/living (This is borrowed from the book but I’m taking it the opposite direction).

3. Nominate 10 or more people to give their reasons why.

4. Use the picture that I created in your post. I’m sorry that I’m a bit bad a making these things… But I tried 🙂

Now, without further adieu here are my reasons:

  1. My four beautiful dogs. They have all been rescued and show me on a daily bases what selfless love it. Some of them have been abused and yet they trust humans and will give all the love they have in their hearts. I really don’t deserve them.
  2. My college friends. I don’t have a huge circle of people who like/know me, but in my small circle I found people who are open about their struggles and we support each other even though we are far away.
  3. Anime. There is something wonderful about this form of entertainment. It makes me think, laugh, and enjoy sometime the ridiculous.
  4. Books/manga Books have been my first true friends, maybe that is silly but they’ve always provided adventure when I’ve felt stuck in one place. Friends when I was alone. Also I have so many ongoing manga that I am following that there is no way I don’t want to be on this earth to finish some of these stories!
  5. My family. I haven’t been close to my brothers, but some of that is starting to change and I want to see where the relationships will go. My mother and father have been my first fans and I’m fortunate to have family that will support me. I know this isn’t the case with everyone.
  6. My writing community. This is for the other authors I have meet at conferences that have encouraged me and are the reason why I have started writing. Now that writing is in my life my depression has faded so much. It is something that bring me frustration and joy. It is amazing creating something and without it in my life I was so lost.
  7. WordPress. We all have our quirks with wordpress haha, but without it I would never have found this community of glorious nerds. Freedom to talk about anime and all the things I never get a chance to talk about in real life.
  8. My job. As frustrating as being a teacher can be there are great rewards involved. It is my hope to reach and inspire students to be happy with who they are. Free to love who and what they want. Never to judge them for liking the things they like. I know what it is like to be called weird and I never want them to get that feeling from me.
  9. Writing. Just the fact that I can write. That I have stories and adventures in my head. That I have hope when I write. That I believe in magic.
  10. Pasta 🙂 Gosh something about pasta just makes me happy. I love the taste and especially if my mom makes it haha!
  11. Quiet moment. Sometimes when I write I look out my window and just seeing the wind blow through the trees and watching the fat pigeons in the backyard. It is a peaceful moment.
  12. Hot Fries. The snack that I love to hate… If you have eaten these you will understand…
  13. You. You are my reason. Thank you for being you. There is no one like you in the world. I hope you see the good in yourself and believe in yourself to keep going. If you ever, ever need someone please send a message. Write a post. I pray you will find the warmth in this life. Know that darkness can be so hard to survive, but you go on and keep living. That is what makes you, you.

I nominate:




Jon Spencer

nesha e moe404





The Otaku Judge

The Moyatorium






The BookWorm Drinketh



I went a bit nomination crazy. In the end I think you all are awesome and there is no pressure to make a post. If anything I want you to think of these things and maybe write them down on your own. Even if I didn’t and you want to make this post, I hope you will. You don’t need to have a nomination to write down your reasons. If I had the stamina I would link all 204 followers. At this point my fingers are giving out :).

Thank you all once again. I cannot say it enough. Thank you all for being my reasons to stay on this earth. I hope you all know how special you are to me. I may not be the best spoken or written but once again I hope my heart reaches you. As always…

Happy watching :).



Ohhh Lovely!

I’ve only been blogging a short time and these awards are something new to me! I’m so thankful for all my followers and for all these nominations! Thank you so much and I hope you all keep blogging and keep being awesome!

So many thanks to Ospreyshire for this nomination. If you haven’t checked out his blog with some spoken word poetry do it! Also there are some great reviews on his other site Iridium Eye Reviews of  some indie movies and anime movies that you may not have heard of yet.


Here’s how the award works:

1) Thank the person who nominated you and link their blog
2) Add the One Lovely Blog Award to your post
3) Share 7 things about yourself
4) Pass this on to as many people as you like (max 15)
5) Include this set of rules
6) Inform your nominees

So here are 7 things you may not know about me haha I guess besides that fact that I’m an anime nerd…

  1. I have mentioned that I am a teacher….

However, I taught in South Korea right after I graduated from college and lived there for three years. That is part of what inspired my name Kimchisama a mixture of some Korean and Japanese I guess. In Korea they have Kimchi for every meal and it isn’t bad. There are apparently over 100 types of it. While I was there I heard of a Kimchi museum but I never got the chance to go… Wow that was a tangent. Kimchi (This is the video my friend sent be before I went and he said this is all I needed to know about Korea… haha)

Annnny way I taught ESL over there and now I’m back in the states and I teach Debate, Creative Writing, English, and Acting.

2. I rescue dogs…

I am a strong believer in dog adoption and right now I have 4 rescues. 17917145_10100278720081045_4042463307483811412_o

(Don’t mind the trash haha just look at the cute dogs)

The fluffy white one is Casanova and he is my first rescue. I adopted him while I lived in Korea. He came back with me on a long plane ride and he still knows a bit of Korean (even though I forgot most of what I learned).

The little turd is Fabio and he was a rescue right when I got back to the US and he is very grumpy and only likes me. I never wanted to adopt a little dog, but he won over my heart and is the sweetest little jerk in the world.

My two newest are the weinheimer/ terrier mix (who most would call a pit bull) is named Pixel (He came out before the phone I swear). He is nothing but cuddles and love. If I cry he sits on my lap until I’m better. He is the gentlest soul.

The Heeler mix is Yona (named after Yona in Yona of the Dawn I finally got my anime nerd out). She is a ball of fire and needs constant runs, walks, and trick toys. She is too smart for me and does more tricks that her 3 brothers combined. I was going to take her to agility training last summer but the trainer broker her foot so maybe this next summer we can give it a go.

Well there are my babies. I hope to keep rescuing/fostering dogs in my future. It is a lot of work but their love is more than I deserve.

There you have it – I’m a crazy dog lady.

(I could talk about them all day :P)

3. I used to act….

Back in the day… I wanted to be an actress. I was in a lot of plays in high school and college. I really loved it. The theatre was my second home and right now I help a bit with theatre but I think that was one of the best times in my life when I was on stage with my friends. I don’t really want to act now, but I still enjoy going to shows. The theatre is magic and if you’ve never been, give it a shot.

4. I went on a choir tour…

In all honesty I wasn’t the best singer, but in a choir I could blend in my voice with others. We did a tour in Europe and it was a blast.

5. I love to travel…

I used to travel more and now I’m at the point where I want to save more so I can travel again. I miss it and I have a goal to get to at least all 7 continents then I can start working on every country haha! I still need to visit Africa, Australia, and Antarctica. I saw some pictures people took on a trip to Antarctica and now I’ve been dying to go. Mind you I don’t want to cross the continent I just want to see it with my own eyes. The icebergs looked so blue in the picture and I want to see it for myself and penguins… Come on they are adorable. emperor_chicks

5. My favorite author is Brandon Sanderson….

And I stalk him… JK, but one time I went to every panel he was on and at the end of one I was right behind him and he asked me, “Did you want a picture with me?” I about died and took a million pictures… JK just one, but it was awesome. He is great to his fans and an amazing writer. Excuse my fan-girl moment…

6. I enjoy YA books…

On the wonderful world of facebook I used to see articles on why adults shouldn’t read YA books. Yeah, never believe that **** Read what you want, watch what you want. If you enjoy it and you aren’t breaking any laws… Watch it, read it. Don’t let anyone tell you what you can and can’t like. This is a rant of mine so I’ll stop.

7. I hope to publish a book someday…

I saved this one for last since I didn’t know how personal I would get haha. I would write poems and stories from the time I was 5 or even younger. I would make my mom type out my poems for me on my dad’s old type writer. I still remember my first poem:

The cricket the cricket

Is black as night

When he jumps out at you

He gives you a fright

Award winning am I right? Later on and when I knew how to type on my own I worked on my epic fantasy. I would write everyday and save it on my floppy disk (did I just give away my age?) I thought it was the best epic fantasy to hit the world. Then one day my floppy disk wouldn’t work and I lost the whole book. I was so discouraged I didn’t write for a long time. However, in the end I finally got it to work and then I printed off this masterpiece so I could save it forever. Years later and reading it now is quite humorous. It was a piece of crap, but first books always are.

Then I wrote a YA romance book and all my friends loved it. It even made one cry (after all the boy fell off a cliff and died a horrific death…) I sent it in and got my very first rejection letter. That was rough, I didn’t know that this was the norm for writers. I just wrote because it was in my blood. I didn’t understand that for every acceptance there are a hundred (or more) rejections.

So I stopped writing.

Then I wrote a few poems here and there and decided to take a creative writing class in college. I wrote short stories and they were okay. Writing was always there in my background but I was afraid to get rejected, to fail.

After college I always said I would write. I would start book after book and then stop. I wasn’t dedicated to writing every day. After all if you don’t try you never fail right? I was scared. I didn’t want my claim to being a writer to just be met with rejection. I felt like a fraud like I didn’t belong in this world of authors and creators.

So I stopped.

For some reason I decided to go to a writing conference. I mostly went because Brandon Sanderson was there and I wanted to listen to  him and fan-girl over him.

I got encouragement and after the conference I was on fire to write!

It lasted a month.

So I went to the conference again next year and the next. I kept going and I would try to write for a month then I would stop again.

Lets jump forward to the year 2017. I went to the conference. I was depressed. I contemplated suicide. I felt like there were no goals left in my life to live for. I couldn’t afford to travel and I didn’t write. What was left? This was going to be my last time going to this conference. I was a fraud. These other authors were trying to get published and they were working hard. I was there playing at being an author. I would tell them about my idea and what I wanted but I would never get past just the ideas.

Then I sat down and was at dinner with 6 other people at the conference and an author who was there to talk to us and it was a great opportunity for aspiring authors. He went around the table and asked what we wanted. He looked us dead in the eye and asked each of us. When get got to me I couldn’t handle it anymore.

“I don’t want to be a fraud.”

I burst into tears. I confessed to not writing, to my doubt, and my pain. I told him that this was the end for me and I was going to give up this goal since it was more painful to try and hold onto it than to try writing and failing.

He looked me in the eyes and told me that I was done with my doubt and that I was going to send him my finished book in December. He told me about how he struggles with creating also and that it was always going to be tough, but if I was serious I was going to finish my book.

Another friend at the conference called me every Sunday to check on my progress and slowly the book that I had in my head began to take shape this year. There were days when I could only write 100 words and days when I would write over 2000 but in the summer I finished my first draft. It wasn’t perfect, but it was mine.

Right now I’m on the final edits before I send it to the author before my deadline this December. Will this book get published? I don’t know. Will I write the next one? Yes.

Writing isn’t easy. It takes work to sit down and write and to trust yourself that you will pick the right words. My grammar isn’t great and it is hard to self edit myself, but I’m learning. I’m learning to just put the words on the page.

It was a long journey to get to where I am now. I have a feeling of joy inside and a purpose. I write this to reach out to you. It can be a bit frightening to be so open on the internet. Especially on a blog about anime haha.

Is there something in your life that you aren’t doing because you are afraid of failure? Do you think that you aren’t good enough so you don’t even try?

I honestly believe that we all are born with something inside of us that is a gift. We still need to work at it and improve on it, but we have a gift and a purpose. It can be anything that brings you joy. I hope that you don’t give up on your dream and that you keep working on it. Surround yourself with those who can support you.

I believe in you.


Thank you dear followers for reading my blog. You are lovely and wonderful people. I want to learn about your hopes and dreams and your purpose. Thank you for reading.



The Otaku Judge



The Spooky Red Head




Also all of you are lovely so I would love to read 7 thing about you! Happy watching!